Library > Amazon & Yog-Uhh?

Time for some "What We're Reading Wednesday"! This book series is Joey's new favorite.

We got the firetruck, crane, & dump truck ones from the library. When Joey absolutely LOVES a book from the library I try to buy it for him. It's a great way to feel out books for him. Well, after reading these multiple times, I looked them up on Amazon. Woo, a little steep for me. So, we bought a few other firetruck books including this one we have got from the library as well:

We have a few others from this author already. 

If you can't tell, he's obsessed with firetrucks & firefighters. 

For those of you using mobile you might not be able to see the video above, I know mine doesn't work, HERE is the link to the video.

For those of you who don't know Joey very well, he is what I like to call "high energy". So, when the weather is yucky and we don't get to go outside, our days can kind of be miserable. I've been wanting to try yoga with him to help us on days like this. I finally did it and found a series I love! For FREE even, thank you YouTube! Joey loved it & it really seemed to help him get some energy out. My favorite part was when he called it "Yo-gurt!" That kid is always cracking me up. He even asked to do more! I call this a Momma WIN!

Self Harm Awearness

Tomorrow, March 1st, is Self Harm Awareness Day.

Now it's time for some transparency.

I have struggled with self harm in the past. In many forms. Most might see self harm as just "cutting".

I don't.

There are so many ways we can intentionally harm outselves to mask the other types of pain we are feeling. That's the only way I was ever able to explain my actions. When I was self harming, I was deflecting from my other problems. I was able to ignore them, even if it was just temporary. 

This definition is from the Mayo Clinic's website:

"Self-injury, also called self-harm, is the act of deliberately harming your own body, such as cutting or burning yourself. It's typically not meant as a suicide attempt. Rather, self-injury is an unhealthy way to cope with emotional pain, intense anger and frustration."

Deliberately. Harming. Your OWN. Body.

Think of all the ways we can do that?

Eating disorders

- over eating

- aneorexia

- bulimia

- emotionally eating

- excessive dieting

Cutting

Alcohol abuse

Drug abuse

- illegal or prescription

Promiscuity

Staying in unhealthy relationships

- be it friend or partner

This is a short list, but this is MY list, that I have personally dealt with.

But, you know what?

It CAN get better. I'm living proof.

Ways to seek help:

- talk to someone, anyone

I say anyone, but from my experience, some people just don't understand. Being misunderstood is a lot better than keeping up this unhealthy life style.

- talk to your doctor

- talk to/get a counselor 

- stop trying to ignore the situation

- learn your triggers

- learn healthy coping mechanisms 

- if you're at rock bottom and just can't deal, or just don't know where to start, email me: alicia.b.walker@gmail.com

I truly hope this post can help someone. 

There is hope.

New Car, Remodel Update, & My Birthday!!

Seriously, we've had two Mondays in a row. I was looking forward to nap time (which is on it's way out the door) at 10 this morning.

Earlier Joey heard me say "I'm outta whack."

He said "Don't be outta quack."

(Insert my laugh here)

Joey "Ha I'm funny."

Even when this adorable little boy makes me want to pull my hair out he can still make me laugh.

Now for a recap of our week.. 

I got a new car! Wooo hoo! We've been talking about getting a Tahoe for a while now. We finally did! We love it & honestly I can't see me ever driving any other type of vehicle. It's perfect for us. It is so roomy and comfy.

Ignore the junk in my yard please...

The next day we loaded up my car & Kyle's truck & headed back to Oklahoma.

I didn't get any before pictures, but these are the afters of what we got done cleaning on the garage this weekend. Let me tell you, it was a lot. I'm still kicking myself for not taking before pictures. I want to go through the house & land and take before pictures of it all before we start major work.

We also cut down a limb, okay, Kyle did the hard part. But, my mother in law & I stacked brush & wood.

See the white spot on the tree? That's where the limb was. Yet again, no before.

Our brush pile,

This will be our kitchen & dining room. Kyle finished ripping out cabinets this trip. He may or may not have nicked the water line with the chainsaw he was using to take the cabinets out. Good thing my father in law is a plumber!!

We got to enjoy lots of time outdoors, thank goodness for nice weather! This lead to some blog inspiration, hopefully I'll get around to writing about it soon!

Friday was my birthday! Woohoo! I'm 24 now, for those curious. I got my nails done that day. That night my parents kept Joey until Sunday morning! Kyle and I went to dinner and a movie. I'm LOVING having help. Our family is the best.

First thing Saturday we met with the contractor. Still waiting on a solid number, & I'm trying not to freak out, ha. Anxiety. That afternoon I got my hair done by one of my childhood friends. After my hair appointment and seeing Joey for a bit we headed to Tulsa. 

This was supposed to be my BIG birthday night. Our first stop was bass pro, my choice. I wanted I look at hiking gear and bows. Followed by sushi. The next part of our plan was to go to a comedy club. We had an hour or so to kill, so we got our hotel room & headed to Barnes & Nobel (aka heaven). After we left, I told Kyle I wouldn't be opposed to swinging by the Cheesecake Factory and getting cheesecake to go and taking it back to our hotel room. That was the exciting end to my birthday night out. Eating tuxedo cheesecake in bed while watching one of the Bourne movies, well Kyle was, I was on Pinterest. I wouldn't change a thing. I think I'm officially old though.

I Can't Just Quit

Yup, it's Monday. Insomnia kicked my butt last night. Allergies are kicking my butt this morning. I've come to realize Kyle's dog is in fact NOT house trained, just sneaky. When I went to tackle that mess with my carpet steamer, I realized it was mildewed. Thank goodness for bleach!! Too bad I don't solve my problems with alcohol, because Joey had a case of the "whines". I just eat when I'm stressed, but I'll get to that shortly.

Le sigh.

I wrote most of the previous part this morning, in the heat of it all. Basically, we were bothe pretty cranky the rest of the day. Not too much improvement. I was cranky due to lack of sleep and fussy three year old. He was just cranky. I gave up on getting my to do list done and came to terms with the fact that the day wasn't going to get any better if I was in tizzy of to do lists and tantrums. 

Tonight (it's midnight, hello again insomnia), I was reflecting back on our day. I was feeling extremely guilty about the food I ate today. How odd is it I was craving a chili cheese dog from sonic and they were $1 today?! Totally random, and awesome. When we fail at something sometimes our first thought is "Well, I messed that up royally, time to give up." I know I have the tendency to give up easily when things don't work out like I want them to. 

So, after the thought of giving up, my next thought was:

"I can't give up, I've already put it out there 'on the line'. (name the movie that 'phrase' is from and you get brownie points) I want to be a source of motivation. I don't want to be someone who gives up."

LIGHTBULB!

How is that any different than being a parent? Besides that raising a child is much more important than any health goal, it's not.

How they're the same

- People would notice

 If I stopped posting about eating right and started posting all these fatty, yummy, cheesey recipes people would be like "I thought she was on a health kick!" If I just 'quit' being a mom people would be like "Hey, what happened to your kid? I haven't seen him lately."

- Motivation

I want to inspire other people to be healthy & to be the best parent they can. I'm also not perfect at either of those things. No one is. People need to see real struggles. I'm a huge fan of transparency. I want people to know that just because you struggle with emotional eating doesn't mean you're doomed to be overweight. On the parenting side of things people need to see that too. They need to see that everyone has those bad days, sometimes all we can do is make sure everyone (that we're responsible for) makes it through the day alive. It's okay not to be perfect. We tend to forget that.

- I'm no quitter

I want to live a healthy life style. I know it's hard sometimes, but it'll be so worth it in the end. I want to be the best mom I can to Joey. Even though I want to run away sometimes, I know it'll be worth it in the end. To raise a son who will hopefully eventually motivate others himself by his own life.

Dishes in the sink when you went to bed? They'll still be there tomorrow.

Laundry needs restarted in the washer? It'll still be there tomorrow.

No pounds lost? They'll still be there tomorrow.

Didn't hit up the gym? It'll still be there tomorrow.

Kid fell asleep in from of the TV? Their brain won't turn to mush, unless its Calliou..

You ate the WHOLE family sized bag of chips, alone? Those calories will be there to burn tomorrow.

Sometimes, all we can do it make it through the day. Don't beat yourself up, but don't give up either. Somewhere someone needs YOU! So, you can't quit.

Eating Right, Take Two

I can believe that I stopped working out and eating right almost a year ago. I lost like 35 pounds in 2012. I gained 30 back last year. Whyyyyy did I let myself do that?!? That's what I ask myself now. I don't believe in making excuses. I just got tired/gave up, I guess. I will say this, last year was a battle with my depression. It seemed like a struggle all year long. I don't know if that's the reason I stopped working out, or a symptom of not working out. Either way, I'm back to working on ME this year.

Plus, my husband and I placed a little monetary bet with each other. The person to lose the most (we need to do BMI, I know, I know) weight wins X amount of money. I'm not usually competitive, but I can't let my husband hold this over my head forever.

For those concerned, all I'm really interested in is a healthy weight. I won't let my BMI get too low. I want to be within the "Healthy" numbers though. Diabetes and other weight related problems are prevalent in my family. Those are serious things to be concerned about when it comes to "extra weight". So, please don't think I'm doing this to be superficial. Granted, I wouldn't mind having a smoking hot bod haha. That's not my priority though, health is. 

I got this array of goodies in this weekend! I promise, Amazon doesn't pay me. And, before you recommend AA (Amazon Anonymous), if I can't find it at Walmart I buy it on Amazon. I'm slightly limited in my shopping where I live. Plus, I hate driving and dragging my three year old to places like health food stores. So, yeah, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

What my UPS guy thinks..

Chia Seeds - AMAZING! I've made Chia pudding & topped it with fruit, I've added it to smoothies, & to my Kombucha. It gives you a great energy boost & it is very filling! I was freaked out when I first heard of it because when it rehydrates it kind if looks like fish eggs. Texture was not a problem for me though. I don't think they really have much of flavor.

Chia Pudding

Goji Berries - They're very good! They're supposed to be a super food. I added them to some nuts and seeds for a healthy little snack. They're sweet, like any other dried fruit.

Braggs Nutritional Yeast - This is often used by vegitarians to get proper nutrition. It has kind of a cheesy flavor. I used it on some kale chips and roasted chickpeas. Very good! I've got lots of recipes I want to try using it in.

Tea Sampler - I loved the echinacea! The respiratory support not so much. I think it had fennel in it, and I LOTHE fennel. The Throat Coat was okay, not great. I haven't tried the Gypsy Cold yet, but I'm thinking from now on I'll stick with the echinacea. It has LOTS of health benefits.

   

PB2 - I've yet to try it actually, but I'm planning to use the chocolate in a banana & Kiefer smoothie before bed! If I'm feeling a bit hungry.

My Fitness Plan

So far I've started the couch to 5K plan again. Today I finished week 2, Day 1. I'm hoping to skip some days and finish it in 6 weeks. I'm thinking about signing up for a 5K on March 29th. That way I have a specific goal to work towards! Other than thinking about it, I haven't done any other workouts. I'm thinking about doing some kettle bell workouts soon. I have lots of plans, only time will tell about the follow through.

After my run tonight

Honestly, I'm already feeling better and sleepIng better. I'm determined to make this stick. I'd like to add, I'm not following any diet. I prefer just eating healthy and REAL foods. I'm not a fan for fad diets. I'm wanting to change habits, not follow a trend.

I'll keep y'all posted on my results and new food finds :)

PS. Sorry I take horrible pictures!

On The Road

Well, I doubt I'll be writing much this week, but I'll do my best! We are moving to another state, which is going to be interesting since we are remodeling the house we are moving to.

With my husband's oilfield job he doesn't get much time off. So, when he gets time off we pretty much have to drop everything and get things taken care of. We are hoping to meet with the contractor and then the bank this week.

It's about a four and a half hour drive. It's really not that bad of a drive. We did have a little incident on the way today. Surprisingly it wasn't with the boy, but our dog Gizmo. He's a shitzu, and he throws up a LOT. Like, seriously. So, he starts gagging while sitting in my lap as we are going down the turnpike. Since I know my husband won't be able to pull over in time.

Let me tell you, from experience, DON'T. EVER. Do. THAT.

Let's just say I ended up with dog puke on my face and all over the side of the truck. No bueno.

Then, as the hubby is getting something to clean up with, the do throws up AGAIN! In my lap. All over my coat. It's supposed to snow tomorrow.

Can you believe the nerve of my husband, he said 

"I told you not to do that, it'd get all over my truck."

All I could say was:

"I have dog puke on my FACE!"

As my Mom always says "We'll be laughing about it later." It didn't take us too long.

Now, we are relaxing at a friends cabin, coat in the wash, watching free birds, I'm working on knitting, & the little guy is playing blocks & trucks.

Pray we make some headway this week. Maybe I'll post some before pictures!

Funny Friday: This Might Be TMI

Okay, for some this might be TMI, others no biggie. Anyway, I'm drinking some Red Raspberry Leaf Tea in that adorable mug (that I got at Target). It's supposed to help with cramps, and I'm convinced it does! I had plans for this lengthy blog I'd write. Not happening. I should have wrote it yesterday when it was on my mind and I was being productive. Because, it is simply impossible to have two productive days in a row! Today all I've managed to do is go to the library and burn some peanuts. So yeah, I needed a laugh.

We all know jokes about menstrual cycles are not funny... Period.

Ha! See what I did there? If you agree with the statement above, just stop now. 

Don't. Read. Any. Farther.

Okay, if you're ready for the period jokes, continue.

And here is that playlist.... You're welcome. Now that I feel a little better, I think I'm going to have a BLT & chocolate shake for lunch. Don't judge me.

What We're Reading Wednesday: Montessori & More

 

Joey is absolutely LOVING these books! I love that the Letter Work book teaches phonetically, I think it is Joey's favorite. We just got the Number Work in yesterday & haven't got to read it together yet. They're all textured so kids can trace the objects (letters, numbers, & shapes). I love the sensory factor of that. I like the hands on aspect of these books. Joey has been bringing these to me very often throughout the day to read. I just noticed they have a Map Work book coming out in July! HERE is where you can find them.

On the Montessori subject, I still have a LOT to learn about it. I love the independent learning, because I believe that learning should be fun. I think children should want to learn, it's natural. Now, we aren't completely Montessori. We have mostly adult sized furniture & such. We really just take other learning methods and intertwine them with what works for us. This is the only actual book I've read on the subject. This book is on it's way to our house today via "The Present Truck" (UPS). I'm a little backed up on my books to read, but hopefully I'll get to it soon!

Now, on to other books we are reading. Or, books I'm reading is more like it.

I've had this on my to read list for a while. I found it at the thrift store the other day & couldn't resist picking it up. After reading 1984 I've fell in love with George Orwell. Find the book HERE.

Book found HERE. After a friend of mine shared about Buddy Backpacker, a 5 year old who became the youngest thru hiker on the AT, on Facebook the other day I bought this book. I read Wild last month and I decided I wanted to start hiking. Now, Buddy Backpacker has inspired me even more! Hopefully it'll become a great new family hobby of ours. Kyle says he will just ride a four wheeler! HA!

Don't Ask

So, here is my story: 

We've got one. He's three. A little over two years ago we started trying for another. It took about 4ish or more months to get a positive test. I miscarried. So, we stopped trying. The beginning of last summer we started trying again. 

No luck. 

Until... Last Thanksgiving. But, I miscarried again.

So, this really annoying thing that people do (including me) has been brought to my attention. Asking questions like these:

"When are you guys going to have a baby?"

"When are you going to have another?"

"How many are you going to have?"

Here's the thing...

How do you know they're not TRYING?

Honestly, it hurts me to get questions like this.

A week or so ago we were at the park and my little guy was running around like normal (crazy). We were walking on the trail, he was running. There was an older couple and the man said this to me:

"How many do you have?"

"Just one."

"Well let me tell you, you need at least 3 or 4. 4 is optimum. Don't wait too long to have them either."

I know he didn't mean it bad at all. I really just wanted to cry and say "I'm trying!"

Just remember, you don't always know what's going on in someone else's life. So unless they bring it up, Don't Ask.